JOAN COLLINS: My wickedly funny friend Liz Taylor

By Miss FB Lyimo*

Screen Siren: Joan Collins with her late, great friend Elizabeth Taylor

After a lifetime of battling a series of ailments that would have killed someone with a less hardy constitution, Elizabeth Taylor, the last of the great movie stars, has died and that fact makes me overwhelmingly sad.
She was, after all, my contemporary and her death marks the end of an era that meant so much to me.
She lingered in the intensive care unit of Cedars Sinai Hospital for nearly six weeks and all of us who knew her constantly asked for updates on her health but, deep down, everyone knew what was coming. 
Her dear friend the singer Carole Bayer Sager even cancelled a trip to Europe because she wanted to be in LA to wait for the inevitable. Not since the death of Diana have I seen such a justifiable tornado of press and media coverage.
Quite simply, there never was and never will be another star like her. I first became aware of Elizabeth Taylor when I saw her in Lassie, Come Home when she was about ten years old.
I had just started collecting autographed pictures of movie stars and I wrote off for one — not for Elizabeth's but for Lassie's! 
I never received it, but it was wartime and the mail was unreliable.
Little did I know then that I would meet Elizabeth many years later in Hollywood. We first encountered each other in the hair and make-up department of MGM where I was shooting the The Opposite Sex, my third American movie.
I was so in awe of the constellation of superstars who sat casually in hair rollers sipping coffee and gossiping.
Grace Kelly, soon to leave to become Princess of Monaco, was regal and cool but Elizabeth Taylor was animated, showing off photos of her children and acting just like a normal mum.
I thought she was gorgeous, down to earth and a touch bawdy, which caused the aristocratic Kelly to raise a delicate eyebrow but elicited gales of laughter from Ava Gardner and me. 

Shared loves: 'Liz with her husband Nick Hilton, who I had also dated'

Shortly afterwards, Elizabeth and I went to dinner at the La Rue restaurant and chatted away girlishly. She told me that she always made the producer or director give her an 'end of picture' present. 
'You must do that, too,' she insisted.
'Careers don't last you know, they go up and down. You need to get a present when your career is up and when it's down you can recall how good it was from the amount of presents you have!'
She was, like another friend Natalie Wood, a girl's girl — though some people would disagree and say that she was more of a man's woman.

 

More...

• Fashionably late, even to her own funeral: Hollywood icon Elizabeth Taylor's service delayed by 15 minutes at her request

What I mean is that Elizabeth was open and sincere, unlike so many Hollywood women. And, if she liked you, she genuinely liked you and was your friend for life.
Throughout the years our paths continued to cross. I'd dated her first ex-husband, the dissolute Nick Hilton (aka Conrad Jnr); then she had dated my ex-boyfriend Arthur Loew Jnr.
I had been the 'utility in-fielder' — an understudy ready to take over from her in the jinxed movie Cleopatra when the production was halted after she caught pneumonia and was at death's door.

Secrets: 'We were at a dreadful dinner party with her then-husband Eddie Fisher, but we all knew about Liz and Richard Burton'

I'd also been at a dreadful dinner party with a group of horrified acquaintances in the Roman villa she had shared with husband number four, Eddie Fisher, whom she insulted and berated mercilessly.
Everyone there already knew about Liz 'n' Dick. Everyone except Eddie, of course.
We had several friends in common and before her 50th birthday party, which she threw at her Bel Air home, I'd asked them: 'What do you buy for the woman who has everything?' 
Elizabeth made it no secret that she adored being given presents, so I compromised on the good old stand-by: a Victorian silver photograph frame.
She loved giving, too, and was extremely generous to her friends. When I married my fourth husband, a large box beautifully wrapped in lilac paper arrived from the most exclusive bed-linen shop in Beverly Hills.
Inside was a gorgeous peach cashmere blanket with our initials embroidered. Unbelievably luxurious, it was one of the most expensive gifts we received. Written on a card in violet ink was a message of love and congratulations.
Elizabeth liked seeing her friends get married almost as much as she liked doing it herself.
Although Elizabeth and I were not bosom buddies or part of the Hollywood ladies who lunch club, we nevertheless saw each other quite often at various parties and had close friends in common.
After her divorce from John Warner, she moved back to Hollywood and started socialising and our paths re-joined. 
When she began dating my friend George Hamilton she was somewhat overweight, no doubt from the boredom of being a senator's wife.
George immediately took her in his capable hands and put her on a strict diet and started telling her how to dress and style her hair. I was extremely flattered when she told me that she loved my short bouffant Alexis coiffure in Dynasty, which had just become a hit show.

Proud homage: 'Liz was a fan of my hairstyle in Dallas and told me she was copying it - what a compliment'

She was very upfront in telling me she was copying it and I considered it a huge compliment that someone as iconic as 'La Liz' would want to replicate my hair style.
Then, when I got the quickie divorce from the even more quickie marriage to husband number four, she sent me a little handwritten note that simply stated: 'I'm still ahead by three!'
During this time George asked me if he could invite Elizabeth, newly divorced from husband number seven, to a party I was giving to watch the live TV premiere of Monte Carlo, the mini-series I produced and co-starred in with George.
I was a touch reluctant — everyone knew Elizabeth's penchant for unpunctuality and this was, after all, before the days of digital video recorders and Sky Plus.
I said: 'George, you know that Elizabeth is always late. Monte Carlo airs at 9pm and I want everyone to be seated well before the show.'
'I assure you Elizabeth will be there in plenty of time,' George smiled, suavely. 'I'll make her be punctual.'

After the senator: 'When she began dating George Hamilton he helped Liz get back into shape'

My mind went back to a dinner the previous week at which everyone had waited for hours in a Greek restaurant for Elizabeth.
George had called her several times and she had kept assuring him she was on her way. At eleven o'clock, she still hadn't arrived.
But George was insistent that this time would be different: 'She'll be there, I promise you.'
With five minutes to go, everybody started congregating in front of the TV sets. But still no sign of Liz.
Then, at three minutes to nine precisely, the doorbell rang. George raised his eyebrows.
'I guess that's her,' he grinned.
'I guess it is,' I said. 'Well, I suppose she is on time, for Elizabeth.'
In came the fabled star, wearing tight black silk trousers, a matching beaded sweater and a gorgeous Art Deco diamond, ruby and emerald bracelet, reputedly a gift from an Egyptian potentate.

Looking fabulous: 'Liz always had the most fantastic jewellery - she was the last of the glamorous superstars'

She was slender and gorgeous — George had done a great job getting her back to her fighting weight. She was abjectly apologetic and insisted she wasn't going to eat.
'I'll just have a cigarette,' she said, trembling slightly as she lit it.
We stood in the entrance hall and she looked nervously into the living room where everyone was pretending not to notice her. Hollywood people are just as star-struck as ordinary mortals and
Elizabeth was the last of the glamorous superstars.
That night she was wearing very long acrylic nails and as the match flared so did one of her nails.
'Oh my God! My nail's on fire!' Elizabeth shrieked.
George gallantly threw his drink over her hand and Elizabeth stared at the dripping mess with dismay. In the other room I could hear the music credits beginning to roll, but many of my guests were too busy craning their necks at Elizabeth to look at the screen.
'Darling, do you have an emery board?' she whispered sweetly, pulling herself together.
'Of course! Come up to my dressing room.'
My room was a shocking mess of discarded clothes, jumbled cosmetics and open jars and bottles and looked as if it had just been subjected to a terrorist attack, but amazingly, Elizabeth seemed impressed.
'This is so tidy,' she remarked. 'You must be very neat.'
'It's a pigsty,' I said.
'Mine's worse,' she smiled.
I handed her some manicure equipment and asked if she needed anything else.
'No, I'll be just fine,' she said, 'and I'll be right down, I promise.'
Eventually, she appeared and sat down demurely on a sofa — nail neatly manicured and looking terrific — and in the few amusing moments of Monte Carlo, she was one of the first to giggle.
She had one of the heartiest down-to-earth laughs I've ever heard, the bracelet sparkling on her wrist as she giggled.

On the set of Old Broads Together: (L-R) Debbie Reynolds, Shirley MacLaine, Elizabeth Taylor and Joan Collins

Of course, Elizabeth made no secret of her love of jewellery, particularly diamonds.
My great friend, Dynasty couturier Nolan Miller, who was also a dear friend of Elizabeth's, told me of the afternoon he visited her in her Bel Air house and she brought out box after velvet-lined box of stunning jewels of every style, stone and carat.
'These were given to me by the Shah,' she'd said. 'And these are from...'
The list was endless, but somehow I wasn't surprised. I didn't have the chutzpah to ask for presents like Elizabeth did. No one could quite get away with it like she could or ask for them in that disarming and childlike way.
When we made These Old Broads together, her last movie, the production manager came into my dressing room in a complete flap after a couple of days of shooting.
'I don't know what to do,' she wailed.

Call me Dame Elizabeth: Taylor receives her honour at Buckingham palace with Julie Andrews

'Elizabeth has asked that we buy a real chinchilla rug for the scene where she's lounging on the sofa!
Not only do we have to buy it but then she wants to keep it at the end of the shoot, as a gift. We simply can't afford it — what do I do?'
'Tell her the truth — tell her you can only afford to hire it. She'll understand,' I said.
Of course, she did understand and told the producer she was joking.
She had a wicked sense of humour, but she'd have kept the rug if they'd given in to her. She also had a great deal of fun with her status as a Dame, even though most of the crew had no idea what it meant. 
On our first day, while Elizabeth, Shirley MacLaine, Debbie Reynolds and I were artfully arranged in our director's chairs for publicity stills, the flustered photographer stammered: 'Ah, Miss Taylor, oh, sorry, Liz … Elizabeth. Oh, hell — what do I call you?'
'Dame Elizabeth,' she trilled with a twinkle in her eye. 'You can all call me Dame Elizabeth.'
'And on the call sheet?' asked the first assistant director
'It's still Dame Elizabeth, my dear.' She winked at us, always seeing the funny side of things.  After that we always had a good laugh every time we heard Dame Elizabeth called on the set.
Sadly, I noticed during the filming that Elizabeth was becoming quite frail and having difficulty walking.
She wore kaftans to disguise her weight, but her face was not as lovely as it once had been.
However, she seemed extremely cheerful despite the fact that she was in constant pain and had been for most of her life.
Between scenes we would chat on set and she talked candidly about her life.
'There's never been a time of my life when I wasn't famous,' she mused. 'Never been able to go outside without photographers following me.'
That was the price she paid for being the last legend.
As she herself said, she lived with passion — yes, she had great highs and enormous lows.
But alongside Elvis and Marilyn and JFK, her name and presence will survive when most of today's mega-stars are long forgotten.

Legend: Liz stands alongside Marilyn Monroe and Elvis and JFK as an icon.